


Bucket list

by soy_em



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Fluff, M/M, Season/Series 03, eventually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-11
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-26 15:27:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12061797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/soy_em/pseuds/soy_em
Summary: Dean's working through his bucket list, and Sam hates it.





	Bucket list

**Author's Note:**

> For [Ilostmyshoe-79](http://ilostmyshoe-79.tumblr.com)'s Sweet Emotions Challenge on Tumblr.
> 
> Prompt: Boisterous

Boisterous

There’s 73 days left until Sam’s world ends. 

73 days to salvage something from the clusterfuck of Dean’s deal, before hellhounds drag his brother down below.

73 days until Dean dies, and Dean is the life of the party.

***

They’ve snuck into a college party. Sam had laughed at the plan, initially; sure that he’d never pass for college age, let alone Dean. But Dean had persisted, so here they are, winding their way through some rich kid’s house to find the kegs.

Dean’s never really had an interest in college parties; hadn’t shown up to crash them the first two years of Stanford, when he and Sam had still been talking. But since the deal, it seems that Dean is working to cross off every potential bucket list item, whether from his own selection or someone else’s. And he’s dragging Sam along for the ride.

There are scantily clad girls everywhere, gyrating against each other, and Dean’s eyes are lit up like Christmas. Sam can barely keep the scowl off his face; there’s only so long he can pass off his jealously at Dean’s womanizing off as little-brother bitchiness before Dean will start to suspect that it’s more.

It doesn’t take Dean long to find tonight’s bucket list item: twins.

“Twins, Sammy! Twins!” His face is little-boy bright with happiness, and Sam just can’t fake the enthusiasm. Dean is going to Hell in 73 days, and he’s excited about banging twins.

(If he’s excited about banging anyone, it should be Sam, his treacherous brain insists, but Sam shouts it down.)

It takes all of fifteen minutes for Dean to secure his evening. A smile, a wink, a couple of shots and some well-timed flattery and both girls are hanging off his arm. He smiles at Sam, a mischievous little edge to it.

“Come with, Sammy?” 

Sam can’t quite believe his ears. This is everything he wants, and nothing. “I’ll wait in the car.”

Dean’s boisterous laughter follows him out.

***

Sam’s not sure he’ll ever recover from the sight of Dean, mid-thrust into one twin, while the other was kissing him. He’d barely taken in the two girls, pretty as they were; all his attention was focused on Dean, his freckled back and strong legs and beautiful ass in motion. Sam’s heard Dean, a million times, but he’s never seen his brother in action; and he’ll never be the same again.

***

They take out the seven deadly sins, but only just. It’s a massive eye-opener for their lives now: there are demons everywhere and they don’t really have the weapons to kill them. Sam feels melancholy seeping over him; on top of the ceaseless worry about Dean, he knows that there are more humans out there dying than ever before and he can’t help them.

Dean doesn’t seem fazed though. He’s determined to live his last year of life to the max; determined, Sam thinks, to block out all his fear with a heady cocktail of booze, girls and danger. Sam’s furious, but he can’t stop Dean; he can only follow behind and try to keep Dean safe, as he’s always done.

***

Things come to a head a week after they’ve despatched the sins back to hell. Sam’s holed up in a motel room, watching Dean drink steadily and inhale his steady diet of double cheeseburgers. They’re looking for another case and researching exorcisms in their downtime; and Dean has been out every single night until dawn, coming back to the motel reeking of perfume and sex.

Sam had gone with him the first night, desperate to keep tabs on his older brother; but he’d been unable to cope with the way that Dean transformed himself into the life of the party, flirting with every girl and cracking jokes with every bloke. They’d been out until 4am, and almost drank the bar dry; and through his dry heaving the next day Sam had cried real tears. He hasn’t gone out with Dean since.

It’s getting on for suppertime when Dean stands up. He heads to the bathroom, no doubt to give his teeth a brush before whatever he’s got planned for the evening. Sam hates the way Dean is distancing himself and his heart clenches. He can’t do this again.

When Dean comes out, Sam’s stood in front of the door, leaning casually against the desk. Or as casually as he can manage with his heart beating out of his chest.

“Stay in tonight, Dean? We can get a pizza, watch some shitty movies, have a few drinks.”

“Tomorrow, Sam,” Dean says vaguely. “Made some plans with those guys down at the bar. Gonna shoot some pool, maybe make some money.”

Dean has come back with less money in his pocket than he’d left with every single night, and that’s a red flag if there ever was one.

“They’ll be there tomorrow, let’s just have a chilled evening?”

Dean seems to realise that Sam’s blocking the exit, and his eyes narrow. 

“We can do movies tomorrow. I’m gonna head out now.” He steps forwards, but Sam doesn’t move.

“Come on Sam, out of the way.”

“I want you to stay here with me tonight, Dean,” Sam insists. His voice is close to breaking already, and he’s stupidly furious that Dean can evoke this reaction from him every time.

“Tomorrow, Sam.” Dean’s clearly lost his patience, because he tries to leave, and walks straight into a big wall of Sam. 

“Get the fuck out of my way, Sam.” Dean’s voice is low and dangerous, but somehow Sam is beyond worrying about that now.

“Why won’t you stay with me, Dean?” 

Dean’s not ready to back down yet. “Because I want to go and get drunk, Sam. I’ve got a year to live. I want to spend it having a good fucking time.”

Pain crashes through Sam. “Why can’t you spend it with me?” He knows he sounds like the typical little brother, desperate for Dean’s attention, but he can’t help it. Why, when they have so little time left, is Dean so happy to be elsewhere?

Dean stares at him for a long moment. “I’m not having this conversation now, Sam. We’ll talk in the morning.” That’s Dean’s oh-so-reasonable big brother voice, used countless times during Sam’s teenage years, and now brought out specifically for deflection. He moves once again towards Sam, but this time Sam pushes back.

“No, Dean,” Sam insists; and suddenly they’re fighting, wrestling, as Dean tries to get out of the door. Its ridiculous, childlike fighting, neither of them throwing punches; just pushing and shoving against each other. The kind of fighting they’ve mocked in bar blowhards a million times in the past.

Sam suddenly finds himself with the upper hand, and he slams Dean around against the door. Dean is panting underneath him, chest heaving and eyes wide, shocked that he’s lost. His face is flushed, and he’s so, so pretty that Sam can’t help himself. Before he can think better of it, he leans down and kisses Dean; not a soft, tender first kiss or a deep and dirty meeting of tongues; but a firm, assertive kiss that Sam never wants to end. 

It does end, abruptly, when Dean pushes hard on his shoulders. Dean’s looking at him, utterly shocked, pupils blown wide, and then his hands are tangling in Sam’s hair, pulling him back in. This kiss really is filthy, their tongues tangling immediately, Dean taking control.

Sam can’t help it; he’s been so het up all afternoon, so on edge, that he feels tears start to slip down his face, even as he kisses back with everything he has. It doesn’t take Dean long to realise. “Hey,” he says softly, swiping his thumbs across the tear tracks. “Hey.”

Sam chokes out a laugh. “I’m fine. Keep kissing me.”

Dean winks at him, laughter booming out boisterously.

“Now this I’ll stay in for.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Come check out my [Tumblr](https://soy-em.tumblr.com/).


End file.
